The Brightest Candle
by JoJo69
Summary: Picture a small town girl. Do you have an image in your mind? Well, that's Angie. Or it was Angie until she decided to leave her home and see what else is out there. But she soon finds out that the world in which she lives is a cruel, ironic world.
1. Chapter 1

I walked down my dark brown, oak stairs to answer the door. As I was walking, I was thinking to myself who could it be? It was one in the morning after all. As soon as I answered it and I saw who it was my heart broke in two. Half of me was happy and excited, but the other half was in pain and in agony.

*****Fifteen Years Earlier*****

_Today is the day. I have to do it no matter who it hurts. _I thought that while I was getting out of my bed in Stamford, Nebraska. As of today (May 27, 1994) the small town population is about one hundred eighty. In Stamford everybody knows everyone and what they're doing. People mostly walk and barely drive cars since the town is only point five square miles. Whenever you're walking to the outlet mall or any place really you always have at least five people ask how and what you're doing.

I don't like people knowing what I'm doing every second of every day. I don't like a lot of things in this town. One thing I don't like is that I don't have a car. What twenty four year old doesn't have a car? I also live with my mother and father. When you're eighteen you're supposed to leave the nest, go to college, and build a life for yourself. Once I turned eighteen I had to help my mother with her diner. I didn't go to a big college as I wanted; I went to a community college. I admit that I am a small town girl, but I don't want to be. Ever since I was thirteen years old, I wanted to move to a big city. Somewhere like Los Angeles, Miami, or Manhattan. I had a plan to wait until I was twenty five, but I can't wait another year. I have been saving money on my own now for about ten years.

Today was the day that I was leaving. I knew that would upset my mother, father, and all of my friends, but I had to. If I didn't get out now then I would be stuck here forever. As soon as I stepped out of this house, I would not longer be a country girl. I had already bought plane tickets and my plane was leaving pretty soon. I had to get ready.

Once I was ready I walked down stairs to the kitchen. As usual, Mom and Dad were eating breakfast. I looked to see if anything had changed, but I was disappointed. They were on their daily routine with eggs, sausage, bacon, and waffles. Mom had her orange juice and her _Of Mice and Men_ book. Dad had his coffee and his newspaper. Everything was perfect. Everything expect for one thing. I didn't belong there anymore.

Mom looked up from her book and said to me, "Hi, sugar. You're up late."

I checked my watch. It was seven 'o clock. That was another thing I didn't like. People here were up by six thirty at the latest, anything past that was inexcusable.

She continued, "Make yourself a plate and hurry up. We have to be at the diner in ten minutes." She made a face and said, "You're not even dressed. Are you sick, honey?"

I was dressed. I wasn't wearing plaid, so did that make me not dressed? I was wearing a white tank-top with a jean jacket and a denim skirt. My reddish brown hair was down today. Another thing I didn't like was that if you were out of "uniform" you were supposedly sick.

"Can I talk to you guys?" I asked.

Mom looked worried. I looked over at Dad and he either didn't hear me, or he "didn't hear me". Mom tapped his shoulder and said softly, "Carson?"

Without looking up he replied, "Hmm?"

"Honey, Angela needs to talk with us," Mom said kindly.

Dad finally looked up from his beloved newspaper. He raised his eyebrows and sighed. He was waiting for me. I looked over at mom and she sat down, it looked like they were both waiting.

I didn't want to do this, but I knew I had to. I started, "Y'all know how I use dream about me going off somewhere? Somewhere where I could be someone and do something? Do y'all remember what you told me?" When they didn't answer I answered for them, "Dad told me that my place was right here. That this is where I belonged and that here is where I should spend my life because out there in the real world I wouldn't make it because I only knew how to work in a diner. Mom told me that it was a big dream and if I ever dreamed big enough then I could discuss it with her." At this point Mom was grasping Dad's hand.

I looked down and continued, "Well I'm done dreaming. I have a plane ticket and my bags are packed. My plane leaves in two hours."

I looked up to see their reaction. Dad looked furious and Mom looked like she was about to break down into tears.

Out of the two of them dad was the first to speak, "You have no money, you won't get a job, or find a place to live! Where are you planning on going! Nowhere is going to just hand over food, money, and shelter!"

My eyes started to tear up. I replied to him kindly, "I know that, Dad. I wish I could tell you where I was going, but even I don't know. My plane ticket is for California, but I'm not staying there. I was planning on traveling for awhile until I find a place I like. As for the money situation, I've been saving for about ten years now."

"You've been saving! You mean you've known you were planning on leaving! Angela, you are just being plain selfish here! I thought I raised you better than that!" Dad yelled.

I was crying now. Tears poured down my face. I hated disappointing my dad. I said to him softly, "I know I am being selfish. I just want to make one thing clear. I am not leaving because of either of you. I am leaving for me, because I need to. I know that y'all may not get this, but I don't like living in a small town. If I don't leave now then I'll be stuck here forever. A few years ago I was too young to leave, a few years from now I will be too old to go out and travel; now is the perfect time to find out who I am. How do you expect me to do that when I'm living in a place like this? I have never left this town. I have done everything that you have asked me to do and nothing less. Now I am asking you for something."

"What do you want, money?" my dad said sharply. I could tell that he was hurt.

"Of course I don't want your money. What I want is your support. I need to know that I can still count on you guys to be here for me when or if I ever come back." I replied.

He didn't say anything. He just walked up and left without a simple goodbye I looked over at my mom. She had tears on her cheeks. This was breaking my heart. I can't do this anymore. I walked back upstairs and got my bags. It would be better if I just left now. Once I was back downstairs my mom hugged me.

"You can always count on me, honey." She told me.

"I'm sorry, mom. It would have been easier if I just left."

"No it wouldn't have. Your father and I would've been worried sick about you. We still will be worried sick now, but at least you told us goodbye."

Once we were through hugging. I opened the front door. Once I was about half way out, my mom said to me, "You can always count on me and your father."

I smiled and replied, "I know, mom. " I looked outside. Right there is a whole other world for me to discover. I looked back at her and said, "I love you."

"I love you too, sugar."

Then I walked out the door and never looked back. That moment was the moment that changed everything.


	2. LA

Right now it was ten PM and I was in Los Angeles. I just got through shopping. I had bought so much stuff because the first thing I did was unpack my bags and threw away anything that was plaid or too country. I didn't want anybody knowing where I was from. If anyone asked my name was Angie and I was from Florida. I had dinner at a pizza place. I think it was called CiCi's. I have only had pizza one other time in my life and it was one of those frozen pizzas. CiCi's was much better.

In the past fifteen hours I had done things that I have not done in the past twenty four years. I wanted to keep doing those things. I was thinking about what I had never done before. Then it hit me. I had never had a drink. Well I had one small shot of tequila when I turned twenty one, but that was it. The only reason I did have that one shot was because I turned twenty one. My parents don't like drinks. I just realized that I had never seen them take as much as a sip of one. Huh. But I wasn't my parents and right now I wanted to go clubbing. Who knows, maybe I'll meet someone; maybe a guy someone.

Once I changed clothes, I walked out of my hotel and called a taxi.

"Where to?" the taxi driver asked me.

I replied, "Are there any club's around here?"

The driver laughed. Then it looked like he realized something and he looked apologetic. "I'm sorry I thought you were kidding. Umm, L.A. has tons of night clubs."

"This is my first time in Los Angeles, I don't know much about it. Where do you suggest?"

"I know a great place."

Within twenty minutes I was at my first nightclub. I could not believe I was really here. Once they checked my ID I was in. The first thing I noticed was that there were a lot of people. Like twice as much as the population of Stamford. I looked around and I saw people at a bar, people making out, and people dancing. I wasn't really in the mood for dancing yet or making out with a stranger, but I was in the mood for a drink. I walked over to the bar and ordered a martini.

I noticed that to the right of me there was a cute man. He looked to be in his late twenties. He had short brown hair with dark brown eyes. He was wearing dark blue jeans and a white crest hooded sweatshirt that had some strange symbol in the center. He had a big, tall glass of beer in front of him.

I also noticed that to the left of me there was another man. This one was very attractive. He was probably in his mid twenties. He had semi-long brown hair with bright greenish bluish eyes. He was wearing a long sleeved white oxford shirt and black slacks. He had a small bottle of beer in front of him.

I wanted to talk to one of them. The one on the right looked like a junkie, so I chose the one on the left. The old me wouldn't have even stepped into a bar, but I was a different person now.

I started the conversation, "Hi. I'm Angie."

He looked confused at first. Then he smiled, put his hand out, and said, "Good to meet you, Angie. I'm Jason."

We shook hands and it looked like he was checking me out. He raised his eyebrows and continued, "I can't believe your boyfriend let you come here dressed like that."

I blushed. I was wearing a short, low cut, soft pink dress with black heels. I thought it was cute. "Dressed like what?" I asked him.

He replied instantly, "Dressed so captivatingly. Your boyfriend should take an interest in what you're wearing more often."

I looked down and said, "I don't have a boyfriend."

"That is _very_ interesting." He said intrigued.

"Why is that?"

"I do not have a girlfriend," He stated.

I didn't believe him. Someone that appealing has to have a girlfriend. He probably comes here every Friday just to screw some poor girl then he tells his girlfriend he was on a business trip or something like that.

I asked dubiously, "You don't?"

"Not at the moment." He said with a gleam in his eyes.

After he said that, my drink was put in front of me. I took a sip of my martini. It was very strong. I didn't expect that. I set it down and Jason and I started talking again.

"How old are?" I asked him. I knew that was rude, but I didn't care. I was curious.

"I'm twenty six. How about yourself?"

"I am twenty four."

He nodded and smiled and said, "That is also interesting."

What? How was that interesting? Ok, so I'm not sure but I think this Jason guy likes me. I wanted him to ask me to dance. He probably wouldn't though, but a girl can always dream.

"How?" I asked simply.

He coughed. It looked like he didn't know what to say. "It is interesting because two years ago I was twenty four also." I laughed at his lame comment and he continued, "I like your laugh. It's cute."

I smiled and looked down. He thought my laugh was cute! Nobody has ever commented on my laugh before. Ok, now I really hope Jason asks me to dance.

I looked up and responded, "I like your eyes."

It's true. I did like his eyes. They were mesmerizing. It was like I was in a trance or something, I couldn't look away. They were the most appealing eyes I had ever seen. They were mostly blue but it looked like there were little green specks. They were truly gorgeous.

"Would you like to dance?" he asked me.

Is he talking to me? Am I dreaming? Gosh, I hope I wasn't dreaming. I looked around to see if there was another girl there. There wasn't. It was just me and Jason.

I asked dazed, "What?"

He laughed. I loved his laugh. I wanted to hear it a thousand times.

"Would you, Angie, like to dance with me?"

I replied almost instantly, "Absolutely."

He stood up and held his hand out. I took it and he lead me to the dance floor.


	3. The Next Morning

I woke up the next morning to the sound of a shower. As soon as I woke up my head started pounding. I really needed an aspirin, but wait a second. If the shower was running and I wasn't in the shower though then who could it be? Who would break into my hotel room and take a shower? I slowly and quietly got out of my bed. I looked around for something heavy. I scanned the room, but I found nothing. The closest thing to a baseball bat was a flower vase. I tip toed over to it and grabbed it. I walked over to the bathroom door and opened it slowly. There was a man in the shower. As he turned the shower off his back was faced towards me. I lifted the vase above my head.

Once the shower was off he turned around and saw me with the vase above my head. He screamed then realized it was me, "Angie? What are you doing?"

Then I realized who it was. It was the guy from the bar last night. What was his name? Jeremy? Josh? Jason? That's it, Jason.

I lowered the vase and said, "What am_ I_ doing here? This is my hotel room, Jason. What are _you _doing here?"

His eyebrows pulled together. He genuinely looked confused. "Angie, it's only eight thirty. If you want me to leave now I will, but why are you freaking out?"

"Did you follow me here last night or something?" I demanded. If he did follow me then I will call the police, I don't need some creepy guy from a bar stalking me.

"Is that a joke? Do you seriously not remember last night?" He sounded pissed now.

I looked down and tried to think why I would invite him here. I came up blank. I didn't remember a thing last night. Well, I remember Jason and I talking at the bar; that was it. After that I can't remember a thing. I was scared now. Why couldn't I remember? Did he do something to me?

I closed my eyes and asked him, "What did we do last night, Jason?"

He scoffed and said, "Ouch. Ok, if you didn't like it then I'll just go ahead and leave."

He started to gather a pile of his clothes on the floor. Ok so there was a naked man in my shower, his clothes were by the bed, and it looked like someone else spent the night in my bed besides me. I started to put the pieces together. I couldn't breathe. I can't believe I did that. I needed to be sure though. I said, "Jason." He stopped and turned around. I continued, "Did we…"

He sighed and said, "You really don't remember do you? Well you were pretty hammered last night."

"Hammered? I had one drink."

He looked confused as he said, "You wouldn't be hammered if you only had one, Angie. Here, let me tell you what happened. After you and I danced we went back to the bar. We had a few more drinks. I stopped after a while, but you kept going. Then you invited me here and we-"

"Ok, I don't need a play by play. I think I got it." I said with tears rising in my eyes.

I can't believe I had sex. I was a virgin. Why would I do that with some stranger? I wanted my first time to be meaningful, with someone I loved. I don't even know Jason! I don't know if he's done it before and if so then how many times before. I could get an STD. I could get pregnant! Oh. My. Gosh. What if I did get pregnant? That would go against everything I believe in. I don't, or well didn't believe in premarital sex!

"Have you done it before?" I asked while tears streamed down my cheeks.

He sighed and looked down. "Only one other time. Have you?" he asked me.

"No, Jason. I was a virgin. I was planning on doing it with someone I loved. I don't even know you. For all I know you could be some junkie who wanted to screw someone in a bar."

He looked up and said softly, "Well I'm not a junkie, but if that's how you feel then let's get to know each other."

"What are you talking about?"

"Would you like to get some dinner tonight?" he asked me.

Was he asking me out? Why? Why did he want to get to know me? If he truly wanted to know me then it was sweet, but if he was just playing with me then he was a jerk. I don't what to do. Should I go out with him?

What's the harm in going out? It's not like I'm going to go over to his place.

I asked dubiously, "You want to go out with me?"

"Sure, why not?"

After that he told me a name of a restaurant and where it was. We were planning on having dinner later that night around seven. I really hope he shows up. If he doesn't then I'll just leave California. I already know that I am going to leave. My next stop is New York. From what I heard I should like Manhattan. If I don't, then I'll just move on to another city. If I do, then maybe I'll find an apartment and stay there permanently.


	4. Chapter 4

*****Seven P.M.*****

When I got out of my taxi I realized that I wasn't at a restaurant. I was at a building, it looked like an apartment. Then when I saw Jason come out to the balcony of one of them I realized that he lived in one of these. I was at his home. Maybe I should leave. No. I should give him a chance.

"I'm in number two zero nine. Come on up." Jason yelled from his balcony.

I paid the driver his money and I walked in his apartment. The first thing I noticed once I was inside was that he had a lot books and music. He had three full sized bookshelves and they were all full of books. I recognized _Wuthering Heights_, _A Christmas Carol_, _A Tale of Two Cities_, _Oliver Twist_, and _East of Eden_. Wow. These were all classics. I also recognized _Catch-22_, _Sherlock Holmes_, _To Kill a Mockingbird_, _War and Peace_, and _Of Mice and Men_. When I saw _Of Mice and Men_ on his book shelf the first thing I thought of was my mother. What is she doing now? Was she with father? Then that brings up the question: What was father up to?

Oh, well. I didn't know and I probably never would.

I set my purse down by the bookshelves. I then walked over to his music. It looked like he had at least two hundred CDs. He had different types of music too. He had rock: M19, Metallica, and Weezer. Those were the only rock bands I recognized, but there were a lot more. He also had country: TobyKeith, TimMcGraw, and Randy Travis. For jazz he had: Eva Taylor, Louis Jordan, and Betty Carter. Jason had so much more music, but after that I got tired of looking for stuff I liked.

"I'm guessing you like books and music?" I asked while laughing.

Jason replied, "Yup. Every time I go in a book store I always get at least one book. I like the classics."

"I can tell."

"I also like writing my own stuff to. Not writing books or anything, but poetry."

"_You_ write poems?" I asked irresolutely.

"Don't act all surprised you don't even know me. That's why we are here."

"You're right. So tell me something that nobody knows about you, Jason."

That night I found out everything I needed to know about Jason Rymer. I found out that his favorite color is maroon, his hometown is Dallas, Texas; his favorite band is Metallica, he has no siblings, and one of his favorite books is _To_ _Kill_ _a_ _Mockingbird_. When I asked him why that is favorite book he told me that he can relate to most of the characters and that he knows a Bob Ewell and he knows an Atticus Finch. Not literally, but so to speak. I also found out that we have a lot in common. His favorite writer is Charles Dickens, so is mine; I have no siblings either; he lived in Texas and I lived in Nebraska.

He also found out everything he needed to know about me, Angie Willard. He found out my favorite colors, books, and bands. I told him I grew up in Nebraska and I told him what has happened in my life in the past forty eight hours; the stuff with my mother, father, my leaving home for the first time, and my dreams for the future.

After we got through talking about high school, colleges, (or for me my community college) and past relationships I realized that it was one in the morning. Time really does go by fast when you're flirting, blushing, and laughing with a somewhat stranger. You know what…I don't consider Jason a stranger any more. I know almost everything about him and he knows almost everything about me too.

"Jason, its one a.m." I told him.

He didn't say anything. Instead, he kissed me. It was so sweet, kind, and gentle. It was like for the past twenty four year my lips were a map. Jason's lips were like a map, and when our lips met we found our way together.

That was our true first kiss since I was sober at the time. I didn't know back then that I was going to fall in love with him and that this was our first kiss of many more to come.


	5. The Surprise

Within two weeks I was head over heels for Jason. We spent every waking moment together. We saw movies, went shopping, and just had fun together. I knew that I was moving fast with him, but I didn't care. The next day we were planning on moving in together. I was supposed to move in his apartment. I loved him and he loved me; for that reason I said I would move in with him. At the time I thought love was enough, enough to keep us together. That's why I was going to tell him I was pregnant. Pregnant with the baby that was his. He was going to have a little girl or a little boy, a son or a daughter. I had to be sure the test was accurate though. I only took one; I was planning on taking another one sometime either today or tomorrow.

When I found out that I was pregnant I had mixed emotions. I was sad, because I was pregnant with a baby that I conceived by accident. I was happy, because I always wanted to be a mom. I was worried because I didn't know if Jason would be happy or not. If he was happy then we could make this work; maybe we could actually care for this baby. If he wasn't happy then I don't know what I would do. I would have to give it up for adoption because I certainly could not handle a baby on my own.

*****Twenty Four Hours Later*****

Right now I was in Jason's bathroom, I guess it's my bathroom now too; I was waiting for the second test results. I am ninety percent positive that I am pregnant because I missed my period. I _never_ miss my period. It has been coming since I was twelve on June the eleventh and it would stop on the eighteenth. It was the thirteenth and nothing has come.

I looked at the pregnancy test and there was a pink plus sign. Its official, I am pregnant. That ninety percent feeling has just been bumped up to a one hundred percent feeling. I wasn't ready to tell Jason yet. I was going to wait, and tell him sometime next week. He's not ready for this kind of news yet; I don't think I'm ready. I have to pull myself together. As soon as I open this bathroom door I have to be a different person. I can't be some weird lady who is worried because she has another living being inside her. I threw away the test in the trash and I walked into the bedroom. Jason was already asleep, I crawled next to him in his bed and within a few minutes I was too.


	6. The Next Years

I woke up the next morning planning on cooking breakfast for Jason and I. But, I couldn't find him. He wasn't in the restroom or anywhere else in his apartment. Then I saw it. I saw the letter on his pillow. I picked it up and it read:

Dear Angie,

Hey Angie, I am gone. You probably already figured this out, but still. I didn't want to leave without saying anything first. This isn't going to work out. I'm not ready for this; I don't think you are either to be honest with you. I have to get away for a while. I don't think I'm coming back. I am so sorry for everything I've put you through. I just want to make one thing clear to you: I did not leave because of you; I am leaving because of me. You have nothing to do with it. I know that you'll be either here in L.A. or in Manhattan. Yeah that's right, I still remember you telling me about New York on our first date. I hope me listening counts for something. Try not to get yourself into any more trouble. Again, I am so sorry for everything.

Best of luck,

Jason

That was the last time I heard from Jason Rymer. When I first read that letter I was heartbroken. I was heartbroken for me and for my child. I realized that my child wasn't going to have a father. I always wondered why he left, but I never found out. During those nine months when I was pregnant I have never felt more alone. I had no one. I couldn't go to my family, or my old friends. I couldn't go to new friends because I didn't make any. I didn't know where Jason went so I couldn't write to him or call him. I admit that I was hoping that Jason would come back to me. I even waited in Los Angeles for the first five months. I was waiting for him, but he never came. I was in full lock down mode. I wouldn't leave his apartment. I thought he would write or call, but he never did. Once I realized he was never coming back I moved to New York.

In New York, I had my baby. It turned out that I had a girl, so I named her Natalie. Right now she is fifteen and a very beautiful girl. She looks exactly like Jason. She has long brown hair and the same mesmerizing eyes. Every time I looked at her I saw Jason. I don't regret having her at all; she has made me a stronger person. I love her very, very much.

When Natalie was about a year and a half old, I met Shawn Reeves. He was so, so, so good to me. He was also very handsome. He had brown eyes and short dirty blonde hair. He was a photographer for a living, so he has traveled the world.

Within a year of dating Shawn, I became Angela Reeves. Before we got married, we did ask me how I had Natalie. I told him that I adopted her. I had to tell him that. I couldn't tell him the truth, because he would think horribly of me. He was also a Christian. So, if I told him that I had premarital sex then he would obviously end our relationship.

Shawn was good for me though. On our honeymoon we went to Italy, Germany, and France. He took so many pictures of me (some were not that appropriate, but still) and I also took pictures of him. With him, I became a Christian. I accepted Jesus into my life. I knew that God forgave my having sex with Jason, but I still can't forgive myself for what I did.

With Shawn I had two other kids. They were both boys. The older one was named Corey and the youngest was named Aaron. Right now Natalie was fifteen, Corey was twelve, and Aaron was ten. Of course, Corey and Aaron were both my children. I conceived them both with Shawn. Since Natalie has known Shawn since she was one and a half, she just assumes that he is her father. I've never told her any differently. I told Shawn that I didn't want to tell Natalie that she was adopted and he respects that. I didn't want to tell her that because it's not true.

Right now, Shawn and I live in a house in Manhattan. He knows that I use to live in Nebraska, so he tried to make my home less New York and more country-like. We had oak stairs, wooden floors, and it was basically perfect. I loved our two story home.

This to me is perfect. As long as I'm with Shawn, I'm happy.


	7. Blast from the Past

I woke up to the sound of a doorbell and someone pounding on the door. I groaned and shook Shawn. He slowly opened his eyes.

"Someone's at the door." I whispered.

"Good job. I'm very proud of your astuteness, honey." He replied.

I laughed. "Will you please just get it? I promise that I'll get it next time."

Shawn scoffed and said, "That's what you said earlier tonight. I was the one who had to get the pizza. It's your turn."

I sighed and sat up on my bed. I gave him a soft kiss and said while stroking his chest, "Fine, but when I get back you owe me."

He laughed and said, "I think I can handle that."

I gave him another kiss before I got up out of bed. As I was walking down my dark brown, oak stairs, I was thinking to myself who could it be? It was one in the morning after all. As soon as I answered it and I saw who it was my heart broke in two. Half of me was happy and excited, but the other half was in pain and in agony. I started to tear up immediately. I even thought of just slamming the door in his face.

I was the first one to speak, "What are you doing here, Jason?"

He looked the same, but older in a way. He still had those gorgeous eyes, but his hair was much longer and it looked like he hadn't shaved in days.

Jason slurred, "What do ya mean? Aren't ya happy that I'm back, baby?" he slung his arm around me and started to walk in the door.

I got his arm off of me and pushed him away from my house. I sighed and said, "You're drunk, Jason."

He hiccupped and pointed a finger at me and said, "Hey I have only had like two, maybe three drinks; four at the most!"

After he said that, he fell to the ground. He was passed out, because he had so much to drink. Okay so I couldn't just leave him here. What was I suppose to do? I wasn't going to let him sleep in my house. Maybe I could let him sleep in a hotel room.

I dragged his body inside by the door. After that, I ran back upstairs. Shawn greeted me, "Who was at the door?"

"Some Chinese food delivery person, he thought we ordered a large box of orange chicken. I just told him that he was mistaken."

He pulled me to him and smiled. "Now you're all mine." He started kissing me.

I giggled and said, "Actually, you know what? That sounds like an excellent plan," I got out of bed and continued, "but I am in the mood for Chinese now. I'm just going to run up to the nearest Pei Wei and get some."

I started to put on jeans and a tank top as Shawn said, "It's one 'o clock, baby. I highly doubt they're open right now."

"Well they obviously are open considering that I just saw a deliver guy."

"I'll let you go on one condition." He paused then continued, "Once you get back, I want you all to myself." He gave a suggestive smile.

"That sounds like an amazing plan." I gave him one quick kiss. "I love you."

He smiled, "I love you and your weird little Chinese cravings too."

I laughed and walked out the door. When I reached downstairs, I saw that Jason was right there where I left him. I took a minute just to look at him. He brought back so many memories. I wondered to myself if he was back for good. If he was then maybe I could find out why he left to begin with.

Fifteen minutes later I was laying him down on a bed at a cheap motel. I took off his shoes and covered him up. I grabbed a piece of paper and wrote:

As soon as you see this and when you're actually sober call me! (My number hasn't changed.)

-Angie

I laid my note on the pillow next to him.

Once I was home I took off my jeans and my tank top and slipped back into my pajamas. I slid next to Shawn.

"I thought you were getting Chinese." He said to me.

"You were right. They were closed."

After that I just closed my eyes and tried to forget all about Jason.


	8. My Happy Life

I woke up to the sound of my phone going off the next morning. I looked at it and the caller ID said **Jason. **

I said into the phone while yawning, "Hello?"

"Angie? Is this really you?" Jason said on the other line. He sounded super hung-over.

"Yeah. So I'm guessing that you got my note."

"Uh yeah I did. Why was I in a hotel room with a note written from you?"

I closed my eyes and replied, "Do you seriously not remember?"

There was a pause before he answered, "Remember what?"

"Umm….you came to my house at like one a.m. and you were talking about how glad you are to be back in my life. After that you passed out and I brought you to a motel to sleep it off. Oh, yeah I forgot to mention that you were freaking drunk last night." This conversation sounded way too familiar.

Let me think…when was the last time one of us said we were pretty hammered? Oh, I know. It was the time where I fell in love, had a literal bastard, and then got my heart broken.

I heard a knock at the door. I quietly got up so I wouldn't wake Shawn, and answered it.

As soon as I saw it was Natalie, my heart sank into my chest. "Are going to make breakfast Mom, or do you want me to do it?"

She looked so much like Jason. I started tearing up at the thought of what my life could have been. I looked into her eyes and I saw that same look every time I looked at Jason's. Before I knew it, a tear slid down my cheek.

"Are you okay, Mom?"

I snapped back into reality. "I'll make breakfast, honey, just give me a second."

She nodded her head and closed the door. I put the phone back into my ear. "You still there?" I asked Jason.

"Yeah." There was a short pause where he cursed under his breath. "I am so sorry, Angie. I don't even know what I'm doing in New York."

I started crying even harder. "Okay."

"You okay, Angie?"

My hands started shaking. I had to end this conversation before I had a mental breakdown. I could not start thinking about Jason again. I won't let myself.

"I've got to go."

"Wait, Angie-"

"Goodbye, Jason." Then I hung up.

I walked over to the door and opened it. Before I stepped out, I looked back at Shawn. He was sleeping on his stomach facing where I was supposed to be right now. This is _my_ life with Shawn, and you know what? I'm pretty happy with it. Was it perfect? No, but I can't keep dwelling on what could have been and never was.

When I walked into the kitchen Corey and Aaron were watching t.v. and Natalie was waiting for me. I gave her a kiss on the forehead and got out the eggs.

"So what time are we leaving for the carnival?" Natalie asked me.

I cracked an egg and put it into a bowl. "What carnival?"

She raised her eyebrows at me and gave me the _hello, where have you been_ look. "It's at the church remember?"

I sighed. "The fundraiser." I picked up another egg. "Yeah, I remember. We're leaving at…umm…." I put my thumb on my temple and rested my other fingers on my forehead and thought. I tried and tried to remember, but the only thing that was coming up was Jason's face. "I'm not sure. You'll have to ask your dad." Even when I said that, I was thinking of Jason.

"Okay." She walked to the refrigerator and got out the bacon. There were a few moments of silence that passed before she asked, "So who was that on the phone?"

I stopped cracking the eggs and stared off at the television. "Nobody important." I took a breath and picked up another egg.

"Well that person made you upset, so I would've figured it would be someone important-"

"I am not upset!" I broke an egg all over the counter and started crying. I looked up at Natalie and she was just staring at me with big eyes. Even Corey and Aaron weren't drawn into their t.v. show anymore. "I'm gonna go for a run. Will you-"

"I'll take care of breakfast."

I nodded and walked into my room. I changed into my running shorts and tank top. I quickly put my hair up before I got next to Shawn. I gave him a long kiss. "I love you, baby. I always will."

He slowly opened his eyes. "Are you going for a run?"

"Yeah. Natalie's making breakfast for everyone."

He nodded and swallowed. Once he fully opened his eyes, he saw that I had been crying. "Are you okay."

I gave a faint smile and shook my head. "No," I whispered, "but I will be after a good, long run."

He started to stroke my face. "Okay. I love you, baby."

I smiled. "I love you too."

I ran exactly seven miles. It was exactly enough time to clear my head of you-know-who. I even ran past the church to see what time the carnival started. It didn't start until three thirty, so we would probably need to leave a three fifteen.

Once I was back home Shawn greeted me with a kiss and a hug. "Feeling better?" he asked me.

He put his hands on my waist and I put mine on the back of his neck. "Much. Thank you for letting me have…well, me-time."

He laughed. "No problem." We hugged and once we drew apart, he gave me a funny look.

"What?"

"You probably need a shower."

I smiled and replied, "Yes, I am well aware." I looked around the house, but I didn't see anyone else. "Where are the kids?"

"Corey and Aaron are playing guitar hero in their game room and Natalie is on the phone in her room."

I nodded and grabbed his hand. I started walking away, but once only our fingertips were touching I asked, "Well?"

Shawn looked confused. "What?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you going to help me start the shower?"

He smiled and looked at me for a few seconds. "Hey, kids?" he yelled.

"Huh?" they all replied.

"Me and your mom need to have talk, so please don't disturb us."

I started laughing. He then picked me up and started running towards the bedroom. I didn't even think about you-know-who.

I know thinking about him after fifteen years was pretty pathetic, but not thinking about him was a step up. From now on, the only "him" I will think of is my charming, loving, cute husband. No more Jason starting right now.


End file.
